Whew. I’m glad that 2011 is ending. While it’s not been a super horrible year, it’s been frustrating. To recap…
There were some good times though…
Some friendships were strengthened (yay!), while some frayed (boo). I hate that there are people that I’m not as close to know as I was a year ago, but I honestly believe that maybe now is not our time. Our time may have already passed or it may happen again in the future. I’m not going to stress about it (too much) and wish those friends nothing but love and happiness.
I’m physically stronger and healthier than I was this time last year.
I didn’t write as much here as I had hoped.
In all, I’d say this year was a wash. Stay tuned for my post tomorrow about the things I’m looking forward to in 2012.
photo credit: Maarten Danial
photo credit: stevendepolo
Once a year, my extended family on my mother’s side tries to get together for a Family Fun Day. We started this in 2010 as all the kids in my generation have kids of their own (except me) and they were having enough problems balancing Thanksgiving and Christmas with their respective immediate family members much less trying to see the extended family.
For 2011, we met this past weekend for Family Fun Day as well as to celebrate my grandmother’s 82nd birthday. Upon reflection, I was reminded of several things that I regularly forget.
- 6 AM Saturday morning flights always seem like a good idea
- They’re really not if you have to be social all day long
- The absence of even one person (and their whole immediate nuclear family) can made a huge difference in group dynamics
- Low country boil always needs more Old Bay than you think it does
- Bourbon makes everything better
- 36 hours in Atlanta makes for a roller coaster of a trip
- Sleep is (sometimes) overrated
I’m already looking forward to the 2012 edition. We need to move it back to summer so we can go to the pool…I hope I don’t forget that one…
It’s been a trying summer.
It’s been a trying year (thus far).
Three colds + bad allergies + injured leg + getting laid off from work + getting new job + graduate school + part time job stuff + Lucky’s lymphoma = climbing anxiety levels for me.
I don’t like talking about my history of depression and anxiety online. It’s a part of myself I share freely in person (and I’m sure my friends would sometimes like to bonk me over the head when I get wound up), but I don’t like talking about it here. At this point though, I have to write about it to get past it.
I’ve spent the last three weeks just trying to get through my days. Getting up. Going to work. Going to the gym. Eating healthy foods. Counting down the hours until I can crawl back into bed. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
This is the worst bout of it I’ve experienced in three years.
I’m thankful that school is over for the summer and that husband is incredibly supportive and understanding. I’m thankful for friends who understand as well. I’m thankful I discovered the inane stupidity of The Office on Netflix. I’m thankful today’s weather was beautiful and has allowed me to sit on the patio.
Most of the things I had planned for this summer are being cut. I’m probably not going to take up kayaking again until next summer. We canceled our vacation to Seattle. My plans to build and launch an informational/training site for admins is being revised. My plan to write some long blog postings for my portfolio site hasn’t materialized. My plan to establish an S corp for my part time job work hasn’t happened yet either. I’m trying really hard not to beat myself up over these items. There are only so many hours in a day and for years I’ve trying to cram too much into them.
The summer isn’t over yet. I do plan to enjoy the nice days. Hang out with Lucky. Go to the pool. Go see some movies. Have brunch with my friends. Spend time with husband. Laugh. Live. Enjoy.
So…my blog posting about depression and anxiety isn’t and is about depression and anxiety. This post will probably make sense only to me and maybe a few other people who are close to me in real life.
That’s ok. I just need to breathe and remind myself of the good things in life. This too, shall pass.
Thanks for indulging me.